Seriously, this is a very awkward pose ’cause I did not just stuff 80 pounds of breakfast down my pie hole!  Maybe I can beg another photo…

Well, the mail carriers got nothing on me!  I survived an incredible downpour, a wrong-turn into Newark (shudder), a passenger van completely engulfed in flames on the NJ Turnpike (the only way into the Lincoln Tunnel) and traffic through the theater district.  You know, this trip is turning more and more into the Truman Show, now that I think about it…

But this is a seriously nice room. It’s a large corner room with work desk & chair (the desk lamp has two outlets built in!), which means I have windows on two walls (one a bay window)! The bathroom is stocked with some fancy-schmancy soap, shampoo and conditioner and something else.. It’s actually on the route of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

BlogHer’12 doesn’t start until tomorrow afternoon, but that didn’t stop about 45 gazillion women from sucking down liquid refreshments in the bar! I might have exaggerated those number slightly – but they’re LOUD! Luckily this room is high enough up (and has very good windows) that we won’t be bothered by either traffic or people.

Comment if there’s anything in particular you’d like me to see or do or take back from the conference – I’m here until Monday afternoon.

Welcome to Annoying Orangeland!

Much cleaner than home - I may never leave!

Just like the Muppets, I’m moving right along – – on my road trip to New York City for this week’s BlogHer ’12.  Weenie Rachel is flying! of all things.  Lucky her – my broom is only zoned for local traffic.  It’s a two-day drive to the bright lights of Times Square, but an easy 400 miles a day.

Things I’ve noticed so far – after awhile the trucks all start to look alike and you feel like you’re in a Truman Show remake.

The State of Ohio is under construction.  Speed limit is 50 and occasionally I’ve dropped to that!  Otherwise it’s pedal to the metal with the other IL drivers.

Stopped at a CVS in Brecksville, OH to try the Head & Shoulders deal (yes, I do have coupons with me!).  The shelves were completely stocked.  No cashier for about three minutes.  Came over and when she saw the coupons she was “Oh, what are these?  Buy One Get One Free?”  Which explains why they had stock on the shelves.  Then she scanned the coupon and said “Oh, that can’t be right, I’ll have to adjust down the coupon.”

Not in my reality, toots.  So I just left the shampoos on the counter and took my coupons back.  And I’ll bet the Walgreens on the other side of the street is doing great business here in Bizarro World.

It wasn’t until a reader made the brilliant suggestion to add fresh basil and a crumbled or grated cheese that I realized that I had forgotten to write that I had crumbled in a very thick slice of feta cheese.

or would that be Cheapa?  It’s confusing…

Do you ever eat out or pick up something at the deli and say “Sure wish this XXX wasn’t so expensive, ’cause it’s really good!”?  Well, natch, you did.  I had some fantastic white bean salad from a deli priced at $5.49 a pound – I can assure you that even with a Groupon it’s a trifle pricey for beans.  So I trudged down to my stockpile and brought up my ingredients:  EE cannellini beans (added a Great Northern for funsies), EE diced tomatoes with celery and Jewel brand mild green chiles.  I added a couple of small bell peppers from the garden and balsamic vinegar, olive oil with salt, pepper and herbs de Provence to taste.  Oh, and one whole onion, roughly chopped since this is supposed to be a rustic-type salad.

Here’s the picture of how it turned out.  I’ve placed it in a container in the refrigerator to marinate a few hours – otherwise the beans will just be bland.  Be careful not to over-season because things taste different when they’re cold – you can always add more you know!

And the best part about all this is that most of the EE stuff was almost free with those wonderful  store coupons!

Well, I actually used a stand mixer…  Saw all these summer ice cream recipes in the various magazines and realized that not everyone has an ice cream maker or room in their freezer to store a container (raise your hands here).  So I made a version of Cherry Garcia that hits the spot.  Since this was the first time I’d tried this, I followed directions exactly – next time I’ll make changes.

All you need is real vanilla extract, heavy cream and a dense sweetener.  I used sweetened condensed milk.  One 14 oz can, 16 oz of heavy cream and a couple of teaspoons of vanilla.  If you’re gonna add “stuff” to the vanilla ice cream, start working it now so you’ll be ready.  I used Fannie May 70% and dark chocolate bars and a cup of pitted Bing cherries (see my nice Rachael Ray knife?).

Pour the liquid ingredients into the mixer bowl and beat until you get peaks. Too long and you’ll have very sweet butter. not that there’s anything wrong with that!

After your cream has reached the proper consistency, fold in your additions.  Pour into a covered container for freezing (I used Lock & Lock) and you’re finished.  Let your masterpiece chill for at least 8 hours before scooping.

Note:  Changes I would make to the next batch would be to reduce somewhat the level of butterfat – this stuff is super rich-tasting!  Makes you wonder what we’re really buying.  Maybe mix half light whipping cream with half heavy whipping cream.  Also, taste after you’ve added the sweetener – again, I’d use slightly less, since it just didn’t need that much.  Finished product?

Rachel saw this on Facebook and immediately thought of us – HEY! WAIT A MINUTE! and can’t give credit ’cause i have no idea where this originated…

Just came back from that exercise in gluttony and inebriation, otherwise known as Eyes to the Sky.  Lisle suffers from small penis syndrome – that malady where bigger must always be better and since Naperville and Downers Grove aren’t going to stand down anytime soon, it’s up to this town to show ’em.  And considering we’re not even large enough for home rule, that’s a tall order.

Started about 30 years ago and every year the festivities got larger and larger:  More days, higher prices, has-been bands you’d actually heard of until one day they declared bankruptcy.  So it was reborn last year (or the one before – time blurs) as an earlier incarnation; a more family-friendly celebration with high school garage bands and parade floats tossing candy unearthed from basements.  This year they had good music (Think Pink [as in Pink Floyd]), good food and lots of vendors trying to take my money.  hahahahaha- good luck with that.  Then everything stopped for what was supposed to be a huge fireworks celebration accompanied by a patriotic soundtrack.  Started with a recording telling us to stand up, remove our hats and place our hands over our hearts for the National Anthem.  Whitney Houston came back from the dead and screeched her way into my brainstem.  then silence.  Then Whitney Houston came back from the dead and screeched her way into my brainstem…for seven or eight friggin’ more times!  I swear, someone must have wanted to pump royalties into the estate. There was a blessed period of silence…while you waited for the other shoe to drop.  And then good old Bruce came on singing “Born in the USA” which is, as far as I know, the only song ever written with only a chorus.

As with Jose Feliciano and Christmas, where would we be without Bruce and the Fourth of July…

For those of you operating under the misguided belief that I am somehow channeling my inner Martha – forget it!  I’m all about quick and easy and cheap.  Having said that, this is how I make my garlic-infused olive oil.  Keeping in mind, of course, that the olive oil was free back a zillion years ago at Meijer (got a couple of cases) and…well, that’s pretty much the biggest cost.

Take a mason jar.  I use quart-sized ones, but it depends on how much you love garlic.  Take a few heads of garlic and snap off the cloves; don’t worry about peeling them or otherwise messing up your manicure.  Place them in a bowl (I use stainless steel because it’s so versatile.  Remember how I told you to always pick up SS bowls at garage sales?).  Put a matching-sized bowl on top, holding the two tightly together and SHAKE.   Shake, shake, shake…shake, shake, shake…shake your booty.  Do it for a minute or two, then open and check.  Most of the paper will have fallen off the cloves.  Take the naked cloves and toss in the jar.  Add more cloves to the bowl and repeat the booty shaking.  Eventually you will have filled up a jar with cloves to which you add some herbs and spices (I use either an Herbs de Provence or in this case, Bouquet Garni.  Add sufficient olive oil to cover the cloves, tightly close the lid and turn upside down a few times to make sure the herbs are mixed in.  That’s it!

Place the jar off to the side for at least a week, periodically turning to make sure it all stays mixed.  When cooking, just use the oil and/or garlic.  When you get near the end, it’s time to make another batch.  You can just as easily add other flavorings, but we prefer garlic.